Submitted by Kevin, Sep 23, 2008 15:25

Weekly visitation (i) denies the child the possibility of even a two week vacation without permission from the grandparent, (ii) denies the father, who solely supports the child, the ability to move to where better jobs are without permission from the court. The only apparent way to safeguard against a Court giving veto control of a parent's basic life choices to a granparent [former in-law] is to keep grandparent involvement as minimal as possible from the start so the court will award access based on that history of limited involvement. Maybe then the parent's freedom to travel/vacation and choose where to live wont be taken from the parent and given, like a leash, to the former in-law(s). People learn and adapt quickly, and I hope parents do for their own and their children's sake. It seems losing a wife to cancer is, de facto, a form of divorce that elevates the deceased wife's mother to the late wife's role as non-custodial parent and limits the surviving parent's freedom - without giving the grandparent the concurrent obligation to provide for the support of that child. Further loss for a grieving, single-parent widower trying to provide for and do what is best for his child. "Disgraceful" just doesn't cover it well enough.

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