Death Rides a Roller Coaster
This article is from the archive of The New York Sun before the launch of its new website in 2022. The Sun has neither altered nor updated such articles but will seek to correct any errors, mis-categorizations or other problems introduced during transfer.

Death and fun go hand in hand – the more risks we survive, the more fun we have – and “Final Destination 3” plays this psychological soft spot like a marimba.
High school senior Wendy Christensen (Mary Elizabeth Winstead) is imagining all the life-threatening risks of a roller coaster ride gone awry right before her senior class takes a ride together. In fact, the director helps her imagine all of their graphic deaths by roller coaster so convincingly that Wendy jumps out and begs the gluesniffing, pimple-faced ride operators to call it all off. Instead of fabricating a crack in the track or a leak in the coolant line, she does what people in movies seem compelled to do in these situations: “I saw it happen in my head!” she screams hysterically. Surprisingly, no one takes her seriously. And predictably, their roller coaster crashes.
Having lost her cute boyfriend among the casualties, Wendy forgoes makeup and takes to walking around in the rain without an umbrella, an obvious cry for help. Her best friend’s boyfriend, Kevin (Ryan Merriman), is another survivor who wants to help her very badly. He either has rented the first two “Final Destination” movies or knows someone who has, because he explains the plot to her: The survivors have cheated death – and death doesn’t like to be cheated. Each of them will now be killed by insanely complicated and visually appealing methods until death feels better about things. But Wendy is stuck in the “anger” stage of the mourning process and won’t listen to him – even though he’s much cuter than her previous boyfriend.
In short order, all the survivors are wiped out in gruesome set pieces that will be fun for the whole (Manson) family. There are car accidents that will scare any teen driver straight, deadly tanning beds – a time-honored horror trope going all the way back to 1986’s “Killer Workout” – snowballing Home Depot mishaps, and a sparkly firework assault all delivered with several hundred gallons of fake blood and a side order of topless teens. Apparently, death is a homicidal Rube Goldberg and the movie is a symphony of weakened struts, hidden stress fractures, frayed wiring, loose screws, careless drivers, dangerous workplaces, and wobbly shelves: It’s an OSHA scare film guaranteed to make any workplace safety officer wake up in the middle of the night, screaming.
By the time the “Final Destination 3” roller coaster pulls to a stop, the audience is screaming with laughter, shaking with tension, thoroughly thrilled, and filled with that queasy, slightly nauseated but fully satisfied glow in the pit of their stomachs.

