He May Be Just a Gigolo, But Boy Oh Boy Does He Keep Busy

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The New York Sun

Given that the money spent annually on video sales and rentals now outpaces box office receipts, it’s hardly surprising that many films are engineered less for the multiplex than for the neighborhood Blockbuster. It’s only a small step from there to the studios beginning to tailor movies specifically to the “if you liked” shelf – the one that improbably assures that if you liked “The Godfather,” you’ll love “The Freshman,” “Wise Guys,” and “The Sicilian.” “The Wedding Date” seems already to have its eye set on that prime video-store real estate.


Merely having the word “wedding” in the title would give it a shot at any number of pairings (“The Wedding Planner,” “The Wedding Singer,” “My Big Fat Greek Wedding”), but the movie takes no chances. Its protagonist, a neurotic New York redhead who brings a fraudulent date to a wedding to make her ex jealous, comes straight out of the 1997 Julia Roberts vehicle “My Best Friend’s Wedding.” (From that film it also borrows co-star Dermot Mulroney and a gag about the inappropriate licking of an ice sculpture.) The bucolic English scenery is from “Four Weddings and a Funeral,” the paid-escort-who-teaches-valuable-life-lessons from “Pretty Woman” (among others), and the sociological exploration of the American gigolo from, well, “American Gigolo.”


Manhattanite “Kat” Ellis (Debra Messing) has to attend her sister’s wedding in England. The best man, awkwardly, is her ex-fiance, who dumped her shortly before their own wedding. Unwilling to show up alone, she does what anyone would do – namely, pilfers $6,000 from her 401K to purchase the weekend services of the Big Apple’s top male escort, Nick Mercer (Mr. Mulroney). From this premise the film proceeds pretty much as you’d expect: Nick wows the assembled wedding guests; Kat overcomes her heartbreak; the two interact with lovable Brits who use words like “scrumpy” and “wanker”; and, eventually (come to think of it, rather quickly), they fall in love.


So far, so good. Unfortunately, the phrase “so good” is not likely to come up often in discussion of “The Wedding Date,” and that’s the last time you’ll hear it from me.


The trouble begins with the leads, who supply about as much sexual chemistry as a political convention. Mr. Mulroney shows again that he is ill-suited to romantic comedy; his peculiar blend of lethargy, petulance, and condescension made him an unlikely object of competing affections in “My Best Friend’s Wedding,” and the situation is similar here. Even when he mouths the touchy-feely homilies that are meant to convey his romantic wisdom – “If you look people in the eye, they’ll never notice what you’re wearing,” or the decidedly insulting “Every woman has the exact love life that she wants” – his tone lies somewhere between boredom and self-satisfaction.


Given that Nick is supposed to be, essentially, a Cary-Grant-for-hire, Mr. Mulroney’s aggressive lack of charm poses a not insignificant problem. The film resolves it by resorting to a technique more frequently applied to female characters: If you can’t persuasively portray them as attractive, simply assert that they are, again and again and again. Within moments of Nick’s arrival at the nuptial festivities, supporting characters set about offering such unsolicited appraisals as “the hunky dunky” and “Mr. ‘Tie Me Up Tie Me Down.’ “When Nick and Kat share their first (not particularly impressive) kiss, a roomful of onscreen onlookers clap and shout – the presumed hope being that they may convince the theatrical audience to do likewise.


Ms. Messing is surprisingly inert as Kat, exhibiting little of the zany comic energy she has brought to “Will & Grace” for the better part of a decade. In part this may be due to the utter lack of magnetism between her and her co-star. But the script also gives her remarkably little to work with: Apart from one brief, early scene at her job, we learn nothing about her life – her work, her friends, her interests and enthusiasms – beyond the fact of her terribly wounded heart. It’s a thankless role, one that offers little opportunity for Ms. Messing to show she’s up to the challenge of big-screen stardom.


Despite these faults, “The Wedding Date” is, for the first two-thirds of its running time, an inoffensive enough entertainment. Shortly before the wedding itself is to take place, however, the film offers an abrupt and unpleasant twist (though one telegraphed aggressively enough that it is probably known to ham-radio operators in the Ukraine). There has been a deep betrayal – more than one in fact – and the characters adapt themselves to this nastier reality with the appropriate tears and accusations.


For about 10 minutes. Then, in a burst of fatuous moral idiocy, the ugly complications are brushed aside as if they were nothing. The unforgivable is quickly forgiven and romantic order restored thanks – of course – to a proverb offered by Nick: “The hardest thing is loving someone and having the courage to let them love you back.” Actually there are many things harder; taking any enjoyment out of “The Wedding Date” is among them.


The New York Sun

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