Following are the procedures for deprogramming The New York Sun. We offer them in light of Katie Couric’s swipe at Trump supporters. “The question,” she told Bill Maher, “is how are we going to really almost deprogram these people who have signed up for the cult of Trump.” The Washington Post columnist Eugene Robinson reckons the number of Americans who need to be deprogrammed is in the “millions.”

Ms. Couric’s remark seems to be rippling through the Internet. Just this week, Meghan McCain told the View that she doesn’t need to be reprogrammed, thank you very much. Of those calling for all this reprogramming, Ms. McCain advised, “Honestly, they can go to hell.” Good for her, we say, though for those who are interested, here are the manufacturer’s steps for deprogramming the Sun.

Step 1. Disconnecting the Republican solenoid. This device was installed after the Civil War by the Sun’s new proprietor, Charles Dana. Before the war, Dana had been fired from the Tribune by that jackanapes Horace Greeley, who’d endorsed Southern secession, to which Dana’d objected. Whereupon Dana got hired by Abe Lincoln to cover the war for one reader — the president. Detach the ground wire only after this step.

Step 2. Lifting out the gold core. This system of measuring value was installed in the 19th century, when William Jennings Bryan ran for president on a platform of inflation. “You shall not crucify mankind upon a cross of gold,” he boomed. Democrats, the Sun reported, erupted with cries of “Down with gold! Down with the hook-nosed Shylocks of Wall Street! Down with the Christ-killing gold bugs.” The Sun sided with gold.

Step 3. Extracting the Supply Side mechanism. This contraption was copied from the Wall Street Journal by the current editor of the Sun, back when he was pulling an oar in the Journal’s editorial galley. It works like a ratchet to prevent the Sun from criticizing most tax cuts at the top margin and enables it to perceive that lowered taxes can result in higher revenues. Be careful to disconnect the cabling to the gold core.

Step 4. Removing the Brexit bar-coding. This was installed at the Sun early in this century. It enabled the paper to cite liberty principles in support of British independence from the European Union’s dirigistes. Brexit bar-coding is not universally available in the American press, so the Times and other papers missed this scoop. Handle with care. The Brexit coding may be needed again, as the Democrats are siding with Europe.

Step 5. Disabling the connection to the Constitution. This is one of the most important steps in deprogramming the Sun. Its system of checks and balances allows editorials of the Sun to be self-adjusting. It kicked in, to cite one example, to prevent the Sun from joining other papers suggesting — vainly, so far — that President Trump violated the emoluments clause by letting foreigners pay for rooms at his hotel in Washington.

Step 6. Unhooking the unalienable rights. Extreme care is required in performing this step. Make sure not to attempt it before Step 5 (“Disabling the connection to the Constitution”). This is the programming that enables editors of the Sun to see the difference between America, which protects rights by forbidding the government from abridging them, and others, which see rights as granted by the government itself.

Step 7. Extinguishing the light of Sinai. This biblical bulb has been used by editors of the Sun for nearly two centuries to avoid, among other things, the error that has tempted so many journalistic types — idolatry. One has to be careful in dealing with this illuminator, which lit the way for the pilgrims who came to America. Best do this step last, as it’s hard to work in the dark.

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Image: Detail of “A printing press with a pair of legs brandishes a quill.” Colored etching by Paul Pry (William Heath, 1794-1840), Via Wikipedia Commons.