A Very Special Breakup
This article is from the archive of The New York Sun before the launch of its new website in 2022. The Sun has neither altered nor updated such articles but will seek to correct any errors, mis-categorizations or other problems introduced during transfer.

The separation of Nick Lachey and Jessica Simpson after three years of marriage has been attributed variously to cheating, success, and meddling in-laws. But what if the singing celebrities were just fed up with gift-giving? Breaking up just before the holidays is a savvy way to avoid spending time and money on presents that probably wouldn’t be properly appreciated anyway. It’s true you’ll be missing somebody to snuggle with in front of the roaring fire – but if you spend the money you would have spent on him on the jacket you really wanted (but he never would have bought you), you’ll be just as warm.
The co-author of the breakup guide “It’s Not Me, It’s You” (Da Capo), Anna Jane Grossman, says that the pre-holiday split is the ideal way to weasel out of giving an expensive gift for someone you don’t really like that much. You’ll avoid that last-minute dashing through the snow to Bloomingdale’s, and save time by not agonizing over which boring scarf your increasingly insignificant other will pretend to like more. And once the deed is done, “there are lots of parties around the holidays and it’s a good time to meet someone,” she adds.
The consequences of pre-empting the gift exchange go both ways, of course. Where there’s no giving, there’s no receiving. In a pinch, the book’s advice about “splitting up the post-breakup booty” covers the pesky problem: “You should assume anything your ex has left in your home is yours.” So put a bow on that big box of books and T-shirts and think of it as a gift from him to you, rather than 30 pounds of bad memories.
If the prospect of doing the breakup duties proves too difficult, you can always use the holidays themselves to get out of doing the dirty work. As Ms. Grossman pointed out, “Not getting someone a gift is a good way to get them to break up with you. Stinginess is not a very attractive quality, and you might get something good.”
And if your significant other gets you a Jessica Simpson album for Christmas, you have an excellent excuse to break up with him.