Capital Profile

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The New York Sun

George W. Bush’s 30th Harvard Business School reunion is this weekend. John Solomon imagines how the president might update his classmates on what he’s done since graduation.


Harvard Business School Class of 1975 – 30th Reunion Profile Book Form


Dear Member of Class of the 1975:
We are compiling a Profile Book to commemorate your upcoming HBS Reunion. The book will contain text and photos sent in by you and your classmates. Please write a few paragraphs about what’s been going on your life.


WRITE IN SPACE BELOW:


A lot of you may be surprised to read this, but I’m now the president of the United States. Really. I’m serious. This is not one of my old practical jokes. If you don’t believe me, call the White House switchboard at 202-456-1414 and ask for the MBA president.


Remember back in our first year at Harvard, when we were assigned a case study on the paper flow in Teddy Kennedy’s Senate office, and someone asked what relevance it had to business school? “You never know,” the professor offhandedly replied, “one of you in this classroom could end up becoming president of the United States.” Who would have thought it would be me? I’m sure Teddy would be thrilled to find out that he helped train me for this job!


In fact, some of you probably thought you might never hear from me again when I packed my old white Oldsmobile Cutlass and left the liberal, elitist (wink!) Moscow on the Charles after graduation for the West Texas oil fields. Like some of you, I started out on my own as an entrepreneur but eventually ended up back in the family business, which turned out to be the presidency. After I took over from my dad, I was able to expand the business into new territory (a 2nd term). I hope to hand it off to my brother Jeb when I’m done. By the way, I appreciated the checks that many of you sent in response to my fund-raising letter when I first ran for Congress in 1978, particularly since some of you thought it was a plea for charity after my first oil venture went south.


But things didn’t come up all dry for me in Midland. I did meet a pretty librarian named Laura Welch. I know you’re probably thinking: how did old George meet a librarian without ever stepping into a library? But people are always misunderestimating me! I actually think Laura took me on as a remedial English project. Twenty-eight years of marriage later, she’s still got some remediating to do. We are blessed to have two wonderful twin girls, Jenna and Barbara, who are the lights of our lives. They have also accelerated my graying process since both seem to like going out long after my bedtime.


Being president is a wonderful job and I highly recommend running for it if you’re ever nominated. The pay isn’t great; I only make one-fifth of what the head coach of the local NBA Washington Wizards earns. (Of course, some people here think he’s had a better year than I have.) But the perks are great: I have the shortest commute in town, the best baseball seats at every stadium, and oh, the travel!


Unlike many of you, I don’t have to answer to a board of directors. And my shareholders can only throw me out every four years. I do, however, have to deal with the press. But – and don’t tell any reporters this – White House press conferences are easy compared to defending my position on a case study in front of 90 of you sharks back in our Socratic classroom. Best of all, our professor was only half right: It turns out you don’t have to worry much about paper flow as president.


Over the years, I’ve kept in touch with some classmates. Remember Ron Spogli, who let me borrow his notes the day I hadn’t read the case? He’s now our ambassador to Italy. But just because you haven’t been appointed to a government job doesn’t mean I have forgotten you: when I got into office, I lowered most of your taxes. Hopefully, those cuts are stimulating your businesses enough that there may be a open job for me in three years.


As I begin my 60th year, I am very lucky to be in good health. I’d like to credit my disciplined daily workouts, but as my father is still jumping out of planes at age 81, genetics probably have more to do with it. I recently took up mountain biking after my baby boomer knees forced me to give up jogging. I seem to be getting pretty good at it. In fact, this summer at my ranch I rode with Lance Armstrong and he never passed me – or the Secret Service agent between us.


In all seriousness, I am thankful to have an MBA training at a time in history when management – whether overseeing homeland security or the war in Iraq and now rebuilding of the Gulf Coast – has never been a more important part of the job description of president. Admittedly, I haven’t aced every real life case study I’ve faced in the White House, but I hope my service overall, particularly after the September 11 attacks on our nation, has reflected positively on the Business School. I know I’ve at least accomplished one thing: changing the image of Harvard MBA’s as brainy, workaholic number crunchers!


Unfortunately, I won’t be able to join you the last weekend in September at the reunion. It’s too bad, since some of the faculty seminars in the catalogue – like “Delivering Confidence: How Leaders Shape Winning Streaks and Turn Around Losing Streaks” and “Downshifting Your Career or Just Changing Direction? What’s Next for You?” – might be a bit helpful.


However, the U.S. Supreme Court term begins on the first Monday in October, and I just hired a new guy from Harvard Law School. And you all know those Law School grads usually need an MBA around to help show them the ropes.


Have a great time in Boston,


– George W.



Mr. Solomon graduated from Harvard Business School in 1991.


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