There’s only two weeks left in the season — but out West, nothing is settled.

And I mean nothing. Nine teams are bunched within five and a half games of each other; one of the unfortunate nine will miss the playoffs despite winning 50 games or so. So packed are the standings that nobody has even clinched a playoff berth yet, and the earliest it could happen is still a week away.

While the ultimate one through nine standings remain impossible to decipher, the West at least has split up into three distinct groups — for the moment, anyway. Standing atop is a five-team logjam that consists of the Hornets, Spurs, Lakers, Rockets, and Suns. Only a game and a half separates the five teams, and it’s possible a single bounce could be the difference between being seeding second and, say, sixth.

At the bottom are the Mavs, Nuggets, and Warriors. The three teams went into yesterday’s games tied, but Dallas clearly has the worst odds of the three, given that Dirk Nowitzki may not play the rest of the way due to a high ankle sprain.

Stuck in the middle is Utah. A fearsome team built on pure talent, the Jazz continue to confound with their inability to win on the road —they’re just 16–22. That’s put Utah two games behind the top five teams out West, although the Jazz will earn the West’s fourth seed as long as they hold off Denver for the Northwest Division crown.

It’s a crazy race that will only get woollier with so many head-to-heads between these nine teams in the last two weeks — starting with a back-to-back between Denver and Phoenix that concludes tonight. Fasten your seat belt, because we might have our most exciting April in league history.

On to the rankings:

1. Boston Celtics (58–15) (LW: 1): With a six-game edge on Detroit for home court and only nine games left to play, look for the Celtics to start cutting down the minutes of their starters. They can afford to: Only one remaining opponent has a winning record.

2. Detroit Pistons (52–21) (3): The Pistons are in a similar situation to the Celtics, as a six-game bulge over Orlando means there’s little threat to their stranglehold on the East’s No. 2 seed.

3. New Orleans Hornets (50–22) (6): Chris Paul’s MVP case should get a boost from Sunday’s national television game against Golden State: It should be easy for him to put up numbers against the fast-paced, soft-defending Warriors.

4. Utah Jazz (48–26) (5): Jazz fans seem troubled by Sunday’s loss at Minnesota. But considering Utah was missing two starters and the T-Wolves have won seven of their past 12 games, it wasn’t so bad.

5. San Antonio Spurs (51–23) (7): Out of the blue, the Spurs have won seven straight to share first place in West with the Hornets. But a tough closing stretch includes Golden State, Phoenix, Lakers, and the Jazz twice.

6. L.A. Lakers (50–24) (2): A favorable schedule seemed to give them an easy track to the West’s top seed. But they flopped at home against doormats Memphis and Charlotte, and now Derek Fisher’s foot injury is a concern.

7. Denver Nuggets (45–28) (10): The team has moved into a tie for seventh in the West after winning five straight, and a favorable closing schedule (including the Kings, Sonics, Clippers, and Grizzlies) should see them finish with no worse than 49 wins.

8. Phoenix Suns (49–24) (8): They have won nine of 11 to catch up to the Lakers atop Pacific Division, putting a new shine on the much-criticized Shaq trade. But their closing stretch is rough, including road games in Denver, San Antonio, and Houston.

9. Houston Rockets (49–24) (4): Just 3-4 since an epic winning streak ended, but they start a five-game stretch against losing teams that could get another streak under way. However, Sunday’s beatdown in San Antonio showcased the Rocks’ lack of scoring punch.

10. Orlando Magic (47–27) (9): Another Eastern team that can pretty much kick their feet up until playoff time, as Orlando is hermetically sealed into the no. 3 position. Their biggest worry now is getting Hedo Turkoglu’s sprained wrist healed for playoffs.

11. Golden State Warriors (45–28) (11): The Warriors have four easy games left — but also five extremely difficult ones (Spurs, Mavs, Hornets, and Suns, and home against the Nuggets), meaning 50 wins might be about their ceiling.

12. Philadelphia 76ers (37–37) (12): Here’s the East’s one true playoff sleeper. In the past three weeks, the Sixers have beaten Detroit, Orlando, and Boston on the road. Believe it or not, since February 5, this team has been 19–7.

13. Dallas Mavericks (45–28) (13): Nowitzki’s injury isn’t the Mavs’ only problem. There’s also the schedule: Six of the last eight opponents have winning records, and the Mavs are 0–10 against those clubs since making the trade for Jason Kidd.

14. Cleveland Cavaliers (41–33) (14): The Cavs had to be happy to get a big game from Delonte West in a close win over Philly on Sunday, especially since that and Saturday’s national television date against Orlando are their last tests against playoff-caliber opposition.

15. Toronto Raptors (37–36) (17): They made a long-overdue lineup switch that sent Andrea Bargnani to the pine and the more productive Rasho Nesterovic to the starting five, helping them to an upset win over Detroit tomorrow.

16. Washington Wizards (38–35) (15): Gilbert Arenas is now saying he’ll take less money to come back as a free agent. Of course, if that were really his plan, he wouldn’t bother opting out of his final year at $12 million, now would he?

17. Portland Trail Blazers (38–36) (16): Brandon Roy’s groin injury may be the biggest obstacle to the Blazers’ hopes for a winning record, as a rough closing schedule threatens to leave December’s top NBA story at .500 or worse.

18. Atlanta Hawks (33–40) (18): The Hawks seem headed toward the playoffs after cleaning up against the Bucks, Bulls, and Knicks. With Miami and the Knicks still on the schedule, they’re a lock for at least 35 wins — and that alone may clinch it.

19. Indiana Pacers (30–43) (19): The Pacers grabbed a must-win game against the Nets on Friday to stay in the playoff chase. But they now need to sweep weekend home-and-home with the lowly Bucks and start making up ground.

20. New Jersey Nets (31–43) (22): If they get into the postseason they’ll have earned it: Their next five opponents have winning records, and three of the games are on the road. They need to win at least two and probably three, starting tonight at home against Philly.

21. Sacramento Kings (33–40) (20): Ron Artest declared the season a failure this week, but I’m not sure I agree: The Kings developed a lot of new young guys and have a much brighter future than I would have surmised six months ago.

22. Charlotte Bobcats (28–45) (24): They shocked the masses with three straight wins on the West Coast, including a 108–95 stunner over Lakers on Wednesday. Unfortunately, the ‘Cats are already dead and buried in the playoff race thanks to their many earlier missteps.

23. Chicago Bulls (29–44) (21): Diary of an enigma: Drew Gooden scored 31 and grabbed 16 boards in a win over Atlanta, and afterward started talking about how he could always do this and just needed the touches. The next night, he went scoreless.

24. Minnesota Timberwolves (19–53) (23): The plucky T-wolves put another notch in their belt with Sunday’s upset of Utah, leaving them with a 7–8 record in March and getting Al Jefferson some mentions for the Most Improved Player award.

25. Memphis Grizzlies (19–54) (26): To put their shocking road win over the Lakers in perspective, consider that 24 hours later, they lost to the Clippers by 13. Darko Milicic had 22 points, 12 boards, and four blocks: Is he finally coming around?

26. L.A. Clippers (22–51) (28): The Clippers had to be happy to see rookie Al Thornton explode for 39 points in a win over Memphis. Since the All-Star break, he’s averaging 15.9 points per game.

27. New York Knicks (20–53) (25): Isiah Thomas must win three of his final nine games to avoid breaking the franchise record for losses with 60. You can bet the current record holder will be rooting against him — it’s Larry Brown (tied with Eddie Donovan at 59).

28. Milwaukee Bucks (24–48) (27): It must be hard to be Larry Krystkowiak, coaching out the string during the final two weeks for a team that’s completely mailed it in, knowing all that awaits you is a pink slip for your troubles.

29. Miami Heat (13–60) (29): Pat Riley has been leaving the Heat sidelines to scout NCAA Tournament games. He’s probably the only NBA coach who could do this and end up scouting players more talented than the ones he coaches.

30. Seattle Supersonics (17–57) (30): Hey, the kid is starting to figure it out. In 16 March games, Kevin Durant has averaged 21.8 points and has shot 52.6%. And he’s stopped taking threes — which is a good idea since he can’t make them (28.4%).

jhollinger@nysun.com